Unthinkable

You give me a feeling that I've never felt before,

And I deserve it, I think I deserve it.

It's becoming something thats impossible to ignore

And I can't take it

(I can't take it)

I was wondering maybe,

Could I make you my baby?

If we do the unthinkable, would it make us look crazy?

If you ask me I'm ready

What does it mean to do the unthinkable? Does it mean acting without giving full thought--going out on a whim and being spontaneous? Or what about doing something completely and utterly outrageous, so much so that no one would ever expect it?

As I listen to the words, I can't help but to think of you and me. But then I think to myself, would we really be doing the unthinkable? Is it so far-fetched to think something might come out of this? The bond we have created surpasses the likes of a one night stand. In just one month you have accomplished what so many have so relentlessly attempted. You have captivated my mind with intelligent thought. Your gaze penetrates my outer being and into my soul. You see the girl lost inside of my tough, outer exterior. You inspire me to shine my light rather than lurk in the shadows of darkness. You listen when I speak, and are eager to learn more about me. You have become a true friend to me, but is that where our story ends?

Why give up before we try,

Feel the lows before the high,

Spread our wings before we fly away?

I can't say I came prepared,

I'm suspended in the air,

Won't you come be in the sky with me?

As each day passes, I can't help but ask myself, is it really worth it? Do I really want to do the unthinkable (or maybe its the predictable). I feel as though this is a test. I am at a crossroads at continuing to be the girl I once was, or begin as the woman I want to be. The former girl in me is crying out to do the deed. She yearns to be released, like a tiger ready to pounce on its prey. But her cries have become muffled lately. The womanly instinct inside me is overpowering girlish fantasies. She is telling me not to give way to selfish desire. Rather, she is telling me to cherish true friendship; to respect both relationships. I can't say that it is an easy task, but it is something I must pull myself to do. The attraction between us is fatal. Fatal to whom you may ask? Me. For so long I have given into lust and temptation, but a renewed relationship with my Maker has left me unsatisfied with this life. I have realized I have been selling myself short of the greatness He has in store for me. So through prayer and discipline, I plan to find the woman of God I am meant to be.

I saw this quote on FaceBook the other day and it really spoke to me about my current situation.

"If you are headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns"

With that being said, I guess you can say my life is about to take that u-turn. I may not have fully completed the turn yet, so lets just say I've made a left turn for now.